That's the best way to describe my feelings for the last 12-16 hours right now. But it has very little to do with what transpired on Faurot Field on Saturday afternoon. Don't get me wrong, I'm just as frustrated as most fans, watching Missouri hand Baylor it's first conference win. But even that hasn't incensed me the way other things have.
With each passing bit of adversity, I become a little bit more ashamed to be a MIssouri fan, and it has NOTHING to do with the teams I pull for, the players I cheer for, the results they post, the university I love, or the community I support. But for a university with as much athletic futility as the University of Missouri has had, the complete and utter lack of perspective from Missouri fans is mind boggling to me. The complete turning of Missouri fans on their own is sickening and, to be quite frank, incredibly embarrassing.
Last night on Twitter, I posted the following:
Memo to MU fans assailing the players and acting like it's the apocalypse: You're proving all the other North fans right. Think about that.
This came on the heels of several Missouri tweeters, one in particular who I refuse to link to out of principle, condemning Missouri players on Twitter, particularly Blaine Gabbert. It quickly escalated, as Derrick Washington and others had to come to the aid of their quarterback, a quarterback that has clearly earned respect and trust in the locker room (which can't be overlooked). The flamer (double meaning) even went as far as to say directly to Gabbert online, "Do you not realize that no one likes you? You single handedly ruined our season."
Before I came up with the response above, my original reaction was "Are you F*****G KIDDING ME?" I'm not sure I can come up with any thought-out, prosaic, impassioned response to that moment that summarizes my thoughts any better than that first reaction. Besides, Gabbert has had his lion's share of struggles, and isn't immune from criticism, but he's been a pretty damn bright spot for this team and this program, and is the beacon of hope to which any future goals are tied.
I can hear the responses already. There's a group of fans that says, "We don't have to have down years. We're Missouri, damn it." They won't apologize for demanding a lot of out this football team and this program, and that's fine. But the continued vitriol against the players is beyond fathomable to me. I'm livid at Jared Perry for several drops yesterday. I'm livid at seeing Nick Florence put up 400-plus. I'm livid that my team just lost to Baylor. But I'm damned proud to call myself associated with the University of Missouri, and I'm damned proud of the athletes that represent me in that manner. I'd suggest that others do the same.
If anyone here has Twitter, I'd really like to start some kind of "I'm with BG11" campaign so he knows that all Missouri fans aren't f*****g idiots. If you want to be part of this movement, go to @rockmnation and RT the following:
I stand behind OUR guys. @BlaineGabbert #imwithBG11