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Rock M Roundtable!

Hey, hey! It's Wednesday!

1. Corbin Berkstresser is probably suspended, and Tavon Bolden is off the team. Which one of these two developments troubles you more?

2. So the Tremendous Stubble movement (okay, it's probably not actually a "movement," but it's fun to say) arose from a random Roundtable answer. What's the next Roundtable-based movement that will emerge? (And no, it cannot involve Jenna Haze.)

3. What's the greatest Tremendous Stubble prop bet you can think of that nobody has made yet?

4. It's Relegation Week at SB Nation! Not that it will ever happen in America, but if you had to bet your life on one sport adopting a promotion-and-relegation system in the States, which would it be?

SleepyFloyd7: 1 - Well, both. But the Berkstresser kerfuffle probably sets off more alarms for me. Mizzou has GOT to have a quality QB to play in the SEC. Monday night showed me that Corbin might not be the sharpest sandwich on the tree. Get well, Frank!

2 - "Sundresses for Co-Eds"?

3 - If Coach Earleywine gets tossed from a game, then rips 3rd base from the ground and throws it into center field, I will shave my beard like this:

4 - It should be Baseball. Might give some owners (ahem, Blavid Flass) the incentive to spend some cash.

ZouDave: 1 – Bolden, simply because it sounded like he had a great spring and we were counting on him to be a fixture at our weakest position. We’re just going to need someone to step up huge at safety at this point. We’ve had to move safeties up to play linebacker in past years (God bless Jarrell Harrison), maybe we have to consider formations where Gooden is lined up as a safety. I don’t know, I’m not a Dr. The Berkstresser thing certainly bothers me but not in a big way. The kid did something very stupid, and he’ll be punished, but in the end nobody is really any worse for the wear. He’ll pay a much bigger penalty that he would have had he just been honest, and he’ll learn from that, and this is his strike one (and in Pinkel’s mind, everyone starts with a 1-1 count. Pinkel’s system is rec league softball, apparently).

2 – Well if it can’t involve Jenna Haze then I don’t want to play.

3 – I haven’t looked to see what has been laid out there yet…is there anything like paying $50 per EE ejection?

4 – It would work best in baseball since there’s already so many teams. Really the thing holding it back is the stadiums of the smaller teams. If the Omaha Storm Chasers were all of sudden in MLB, they just can’t support those kinds of games and it would take too long to get the stadiums up to muster. By the time they did, Omaha would be back in AAA and would have this bigger stadium they can’t fill. But if the farm systems hadn’t been thought up in the 30s by Branch Rickey (top 3 most important non-players in professional baseball history, you can make the argument for #1) then I think that’s exactly where we’d have ended up.

Bill C.: 1. I really wanted to say Bolden, simply because it is the less-expected of the two answers. But as long as "Starting quarterback Ashton Glaser/Maty Mauk" is on the table for the Georgia game, my answer has to be Berkstresser. Bolden certainly had potential, but he was still only on the third string when spring practices ended. I think Kenronte Walker and Braylon Webb were going to be the starters anyway. But until we know that James Franklin is healthy, Berkstresser's absence is larger, even if Glaser looked good in the spring game.

2. I guess "Michael Atchison becomes Music Snob Laureate" is too obvious?

3. Since the seal has already been broken on the Fibbonacci sequence, I say we need something related to weekend attendance.

4. Before this week, my answer would have been MLB. But the simulation I did for a RELEGATION WEEK piece tomorrow has changed my mind. It would be absolutely perfect in both college football and college basketball. It would cut the bad weight from the top conferences (sorry, Indiana, Kansas and Washington State) and open up the door for higher levels of competition. It won't ever happen -- unless it was a decree straight from the top of the NCAA, it would require conferences to sign off, and the top conferences wouldn't -- but the structure, as defined today by Jason Kirk, would be incredible.

ZouDave: Did you just apologize to kansas (follow-up question, did you just capitalize kansas)?

For shame, William Rehnquist Shatner Connelly. For shame.

The Beef: Good morning all...all is quiet currently in "Two kids under 2" land...

And sorry if my response puts a ton of these > things into the email string...not sure what is going on with these stupid things.

I will side with Bill on this one. While I liked what Bolden may have ended up offering (first string nickel-back I believe at this point while being second string safety), the mere thought of Glaser/Mauk vs. UGA is tough. And considering Franklin will be coming off an injury...even if he is healthy, there is so much potential PT in that SELA game that it would be a shame for Berk to miss it.

The Tailgate Princess and The Veal College Fundraiser?

I am sure MCBoomofDoom (hey Boom) is sitting on some ridiculous prop bet, like offering $0.24 for every time Chelsea Thomas goes to the rosin bag

Baseball makes the most actual sense, but Dave is right about the stadium situaiton. I like the idea in college, but I imagine the conference TV deals would have something to say about it

Bill C.: The funny thing about the conference TV problem is, the more I think about it, the more I realize it isn't a problem. Major conferences would lose teams like Duke, Kansas, Iowa State and Ole Miss, teams that almost never play in a nationally-televised game anyway. The Pac-12 would lose USC-Arizona and gain USC-Boise State. The Big 12 would lose Iowa State-Oklahoma in favor of, UCF-Oklahoma (which is, at worst, a wash). Et cetera. The argument is one of many reasons why this will never happen, but it only feels like a problem.

The Beef: Though obviously we are speaking hypothetically, it is not a conference issue, but a school issue. You are right about the conference not caring, but since so much money is tied to the school via the conference TV deal, that is where the relagation would hurt the schools.

ghtd36: Happiness is starting your computer, flipping on TweetDeck, and having 18 "#TremendousStubble" Tweets waiting.

1- I think you've got to do with Berkstresser here. I'm not sure if you guys have heard, but the quarterback position is pretty important. That's not to say Mizzou is swimming in quality safety talent, but the prospect of throwing Ashton Glaser or Maty Mauk (with all due respect to those two gentlemen) out there in the SEC opener makes me want to curl up in the corner and nurse a bottle of your finest spirit.

2- ZouDave's sister and a soup kitchen. That's all I've got so far, come back to me.

3- I'm still waiting for someone to offer one insane jackpot prop bet. For example, for the longest time, I remember the longest odds on the Super Bowl being for a safety, because safeties never happen. And, sure enough, when Tom Brady was called for intentional grounding in the end zone in this year's Super Bowl, it paid off at 60-1, a huge amount for any NFL game. So, I'm waiting for someone to put something like a $1,000 prop on Jenna Marston hitting a walk-off homer off the foul pole.

4- I think college football is your obvious choice here. Anyone who watched the FCS title game between Sam Houston State (GO KATS) and North Dakota State has to think that they can beat New Mexico, Akron and Florida Atlantic.

ZouDave: I think instead of the relegation stuff we should do the College Football Championship like a title belt.

Fortunately, someone has already done this starting from 1972. Mizzou held the belt for 5 glorious defenses. Right now the belt is in West Virginia’s hands, so it’s likely going back to the Big XII for a spell.

KU Doug: 1 - There's a surname out there of "Berkstresser"? I think that's the development that troubles me most, because how did I not know that?

2 - Can it involve Jenna's lesser-known sister: Jessica Smog?

3 - Which softball player will grow tremendous stubble first.

4 - Maybe... MAYBE... relegation could work with hockey. But, only if the NHL gives up this pipe dream of having teams in the Sunshine Belt. You're a cold-weather sport, THE cold-weather sport for God's sake, it's okay! Embrace your inner-north, you know you want to. Have the core teams in Canda, the Northeast and Great Lakes region. You want to keep LA, St. Louis? Fine. But, seriously: Phoenix, Florida, Carolina, Nashville, Anaheim, Dallas, San Jose, Tampa Bay. Who are we trying to fool? Hockey's future lies in regional interest and strength. Granted, a region with a foot-print many times the size of England, but one where relegation might be a possibility.

ZouDave: /starts typing in Google Image Search: Jessica Smog

/realizes joke

/shakes fist towards Albuquerque

KU Doug: /exults

Michael Atchison: I’m not a snob, I’m an enthusiast.

1. Berkstresser.

2. Greg’s wedding registry.

3. First, I need to go and read all the prop bets.

4. How about soccer? There’s already a second-tier pro league, and those guys don’t look foolish when they’re on the field with MLS teams.

ZouDave: Relegation in soccer? Will never catch on.

KU Doug: Is it just this year that the MLS has started using the European/FIFA style where the home team is listed first on the schedule/box score/ticker crawl? Because, I'll be honest, I find that incredibly stupid.

(An hour later…)

Bill C.: Huh. This thing died BEFORE D-Sing could kill it.

Michael Atchison: In an effort to liven things up, enjoy Zeus, playing my new favorite tune of the moment:

SleepyFloyd7: That's some quality stuff, and a quality "McCartney 'Stache" right there.

Michael Atchison: I like it mostly because that’s what everyone looked like when I was a kid.

SleepyFloyd7: "... that’s what everyone looked like when I was a kid." - Michael Atchison

Michael Atchison: My, I say, that looks like Colonel Angus!

SleepyFloyd7: That guy sometimes overstays his welcome.

Michael Atchison: Here’s my other major crush of the moment, Allo Darlin’:

D-Sing: /looks up from want ads

/goes back to job search

ghtd36: I'm surprised Atchison didn't dust off this gem from his youth:

ZouDave: OH MY GOD DO THIS (actually not sure why I think this is so funny, but I do)

Do This

Go to Google Translate; Copy this text:

pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk

Pick German as the "from" language; Press the "Listen" button.

Bill C.: Yeah, we have the same sense of humor.