clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:


At the conference HQ, Team Speed Kills, we're power-ranking the SEC. Here's this week's ballot.

Marvin Gentry-USA TODAY Sports

In a week where most of the conference had to scrape by, there was one overarching theme: survival. By any means necessary, just get past the team in front of you currently and make it to next week without an L. Obviously, some teams were more successful than others in this endeavor, but that's life in the SEC. It may not always be flashy, but you must always focus on staying alive.

1. Alabama Crimson Tide - The only things standing between the Tide and a trip to the Playoff are Florida and an Auburn team that totally definitely has not been sandbagging their season since week one so they can burn down the entire state by rolling on Bama in the Iron Bowl. Totally.

2. Mississippi St. Bulldogs - In case you needed any more proof that they're legitimately good, the Bulldogs survived an encounter with Bret Bielema within seven days of Thanksgiving.

3. Florida Gators - Almost got caught looking ahead because AIN'T NO ONE OUT HERE CAN STOP THINKIN' BOUT THEM NOLES.

4.  Arkansas Razorbacks - I know it's too late now, but let me give you a tip: When Dak Prescott goes on a heater and throws for 500 yards, your best course of action is not to try and keep pace. Especially when Dak - as good as he is - can't match your ground game.

5.  OIe Miss Rebels - ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: Allow Brandon Harris to throw for 300+ yards and beat LSU anyway.

6. Tennessee Volunteers - This losing streak may not have the same sting as the Florida and Alabama losing streaks, but I'll be it feels good to finally get a W over Missouri in the SEC. Sure, it took an inordinately down year offensively for the Tigers to do it, but let's not pick nits here.

7. LSU Tigers - Les Miles is playing chicken with the boosters now. "OH, YOU'RE GOING TO FIRE ME IF I DON'T WIN OUT? LET'S SEE HOW SERIOUS YOU REALLY ARE."

8. Georgia Bulldogs - It says a lot about how UGA's season has gone that they let Georgia Southern take them to overtime and it didn't really register with me until Sunday.

9. Auburn Tigers - At this point, I'm rooting for an Auburn-Texas Tech match-up in the Texas Bowl. That sucker will have an over/under of 150.

10. Texas A&M Aggies - You shut out Vanderbilt. Well done. Here's your cookie. Have fun with Leonard next week.

11. Vanderbilt Commodores - Derek Mason walks into his office after a long session of film study and finds a note taped to his door. It reads: "We softened 'em up for you. Bring those fools in orange down to our level. - GP"

12. Missouri Tigers - Being emotionally charged can really boost a team's performance, but it can't change the fact that your offense is historically, statistically, objectively, disastrously bad.

13. Kentucky Wildcats - The Wildcats were the fifth grader taking a first grader's lunch money. I hope they enjoy their chocolate milk.

14. South Carolina Gamecocks - Look, I know they wear the same colors, but you can't go mixing up North Carolina and The Citadel like that, Gamecocks. They're very different teams and YOU LOST TO THE WRONG ONE.