WHO: Missouri Tigers vs. Southeast Missouri Red Hawks
WHAT: ACTUAL REAL FOOTBALL HOT DAMN Y'ALL
WHEN: 3pm CT
WHERE: On a SWELTERINGLY hot Faurot Field
TELEVISION: SEC Network alternate, WatchESPN
Song of the Week with DJ Beatz
DJ Beatz: I'm going to go with Pinkel Dance as song of this week. I think it embraces the Tiger spirit as a good kick off to the season, let's anticipate celebration all season!! Go Mizzou!
- With a predicted temperature of one thousand degrees, tomorrow's game should set a new record for hottest game played in Memorial Stadium.
- Though SEMO shouldn't give the Tigers much trouble, they are certainly good enough to best several Power Five teams. Including:
1. The current forecast for Saturday is 90 degrees and sunny, which means it's going to be HOT in Memorial Stadium. What advice do you have for beating the heat in the stands and at the tailgate?
BillSelfsToupee - There is only one way to live your life son, and that is well hydrated. You need to drink plenty of delicious, cold, preferably alcoholic, beverages. Pound them until you feel cool and light as a feather. Thank me afterwards.
The Beef - Hydration is the name of the game. Alcoholic drinks are fine (and welcomed), but start and finish with water and try to get some intermingled. You might have to pee a lot, but it will be worth it in the long run.
Jack Peglow - With about an hour left before kickoff, head over to the East entrance of the stadium. Pace around the parking lot, keeping your eyes on the fans entering the game. When you spot someone wearing a lanyard with a large, plastic ticket attached to the end, fall in line behind them. Enter the stadium roughly five or six patrons behind them, then follow your mark to the elevators. When the attendant is distracted checking their loge passes, discreetly duck into the elevator lobby. Congratulations, you are now free to enjoy the game from the comforts of the air-conditioned club level.
Fullback University - Mizzou heat can't melt steel resolve.
switzy227 - Big hats. And water. And shade. And more water.
HHKB Chris - The less clothes you wear the better, sure it may make others tailgating and sitting around you a little bit uncomfortable, but hey that's their problem, not yours. Be free. Also, for every beer you have, have at least a sip of water, just to maintain balance. Unless you're BST, then switch water with gravy, sweet delicious gravy.
Sam Snelling - I'll be beating the heat by watching at home in my air conditioned living room with beer. Well, probably beer. Maybe whiskey. If you must go to the game, just drink lots of booze. If you're drunk, you won't notice. I think.
Chris L Turner - DRINK WATER. Can't stress that enough. Been at Mizzou for two years now and I've seen way to many people faint from the heat, so even if you're full on the alcohol train for tailgating, have water on standby.
Adam Cribbs - Drink lots of water, don't be that guy that chooses to only drink booze and then dehydrates and causes a big scene in the stands because you thought you could handle it. Also, wear a leaf of frozen cabbage under your hat. We don't need no South Koreans telling us what is and isn't a distraction. Also make sure to bring a giant umbrella to the stadium to give yourself plenty of shade. Remember, the bigger the better!
AlaTiger - Hat (go for the fisherman's hat - no one will care how you look), sunscreen, shorts & T-shirt, and plenty of water. My rule of thumb is one bottle of water per beer. I'll be enjoying the game in my cool, dry TV room, so I will do shorts, T-shirt, and beer. I'll still mix in some water too.
2. Missouri squares off against an FCS team who - no offense Redhawks - is much less talented than the Tigers. How quickly do the fans press the panic button if Mizzou struggles? What will it take for you to press that button personally?
BST - My button can only be pressed delicately and with precision. There is less than a 1% chance that this game will do so. Just win the game and stay healthy.
Beef - If we start with two bad offensive drives, fans in the stands will start to mutter and sporadically boo. I don’t know that I hit the panic button at all in this game, provided we win it.
Peglow - The defense is going to what keeps Mizzou in games, at least until the offense develops enough to become a legitimate threat. If things don't look as polished as we've been led to believe they are, I'll be quite a bit worried. Barry Odom's defense is a complicated one, so it isn't out of the realm of possibility to suggest that Missouri's players may not have a firm grasp of it just yet.
Fullback U - Is the game within 2 TDs at halftime? Panic. Is the game within 2 TDs in the 4th quarter? I'll panic.
switzy227 - Fans will get antsy too quickly - whatever it is. I will be a little concerned if the game is close (2 touchdowns or less) in the 4th. But I won't panic unless we lose.
Chris - If Mizzou hasn't scored a TD in the first quarter, the people will panic, I will "panic" if SEMO is within 18 by the middle of the third quarter.
Snelling - I plan on hitting the panic button 30 minutes before kickoff regardless. My optimism of the season will melt away into a puddle of despair that will last until Missouri is 4 touchdowns ahead, no make that 5. 4 TD's still seems kind of close.
Turner - First off, SEMO has my thanks because they almost beat kansas last year. Hell, they scored 21 in the fourth, but ran out of time to complete the comeback. As for the panic button? Well, I would say if it's going into the 4th quarter and the Tigers aren't winning by 17, go ahead and punch it.
Cribbs - I will press the panic button if Maty and the freshman receivers struggle to find any rhythm before the beginning of the 4th quarter. The fans will press the panic button if Maty doesn't throw a touchdown on his first pass from the 25 yard line.
AlaTiger - The generic fan will start flipping out if Mizzou doesn't have a lead at the end of the first quarter, evolving into full panic if Mizzou doesn't have a two-TD lead by half. If Mizzou is only up a TD in the fourth quarter, things won't be pretty in my TV room.
3. It's hard to make many judgments about the team when the opponent plays at the FCS level, but that won't stop us from trying, damn it. What are some key factors you'll be keeping your eye on during the game?
BST - Yards after the catch. Blocking/holes opened by the O-line. QB pressure by the D-line.
Beef - I want to see how well the OL blocks for the RB’s. I want to see what sort of pressure the front-four do bring when it is only them. I want to see how many passes are caught vs. dropped. I want to see who plays.
Peglow - How Odom will be playing his secondary. I want to see how far back he wants them, especially when he cranks up the pressure. Also, I want to see if we can glean any hints of a 3-4.
Fullback U - Tendencies. Is Mizzou trying to pass the ball to get the receivers experience early or are they working on the run game more? How many different players get reps? How do special teams look - this is something that'll probably be overlooked but Mizzou's special teams have a fair amount of work to do, including kick returners but also Andrew Baggett and Corey Fatony.
switzy227 - Special teams, pass rush, and WR/TE play. I hope to see some glimpses of how the receiver distribution is going to work out and would love to see a lot of guys getting a chance.
Chris - I'll be interested to see the distribution in the passing game, Maty's accuracy and if Lock is not redshirted, how many snaps he gets.
Snelling - Offense, Defense and Special teams mostly. I'll also be watching the coaches to see what they do. If they're coaching hard or not, making adjustments and whatnot. And who scores the points. I'll be watching for that.
Turner - How quickly can the young receivers make an impact? Will we see a level of comfort developed between them and Maty Mauk early? Also excited to see Barry Odom's defense make it's first appearance at Faurot this year.
Cribbs - I will be watching to see how the DEs do against inferior OTs. If they can hold their own in the run game and get consistent pressure by collapsing the pocket, I'll feel pretty good. I also want to see at least one young receiver torch a weaker defense. If our WRs can't use this game to get the ball rolling, it's gonna be a lot harder when there's a chance of an upset.
AlaTiger - I will want to see how the running backs not named Hansbrough fare. I'm looking for a breakout performance from anyone at WR. I want to see how Odom's defense is different, realizing that he'll keep substantial chunks of that under his hat.
RMN Grand will be taking a new direction this season. Instead of picking the big SEC games of the week, we'll bet solely on the outcomes of Mizzou's game that week. The three categories will be:
- Straight up
- Against the spread
This week was difficult, since most oddsmakers don't set lines for FCS v. FBS games. Because of that, I was forced to use some incredibly scientific formulas to make up my own lines. They are as follows:
And now, our picks!
Lastly, let us all take a moment of silence to appreciate how great it is to have football back in our lives.