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SEC Power Rankings: the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

The top of the conference is incredibly good. The bottom is historically, sickeningly bad. Parity just means more here in the SEC.

NCAA Football: Texas A&M at Alabama
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Last weekend’s slate of games didn’t really shift much beyond confirming that Auburn is actually very good and not just riding a heater. The best teams in the conference are good enough to compete with just about anyone else in the nation, while the bottom-feeders would be lucky to finish above .500 in a conference outside of the Power Five. This divide doesn’t mean much for the resumes of the league’s best, it just ensures that any match-up that doesn’t pit two of the good teams against each other will be utterly unwatchable garbage television. Isn’t life in the SEC great?

Jack Peglow
  1. Alabama Crimson Tide - Honestly, the biggest thing the Tide have working against them is Jalen Hurts’ eerie resemblance to Captain Barbosa. It’s smooth sailing beyond that. Pun intended.
  2. Texas A&M Aggies - Don’t get down, Aggies. You held Lane Kiffin to his lowest point total of the year - fewer points than the Tide scored against Kentucky after turning cruise control on from the drop, basically. Can’t wait to see Myles Garrett and co. absolutely feast on whichever poor Big 12 offense is served to them in the Sugar Bowl.
  3. Auburn Tigers - With a quickness that he would probably appreciate had the previous state of the team not brought on several stress-induced nights without sleep, Gus Malzahn’s Tigers suddenly look like a legitimate threat to everyone remaining on their schedule. Including their neighbors on the other side of the state.
  4. LSU Tigers - Ed Orgeron is destined to put together an interim head coaching resume that will have fans clamoring for a removal of the first part of his title, only to have the university spurn him. So it is written, so it shall be.
  5. Ole Miss Rebels -
  6. Tennessee Volunteers - With the rescheduling of Florida-LSU, Tennessee can (probably) relax a bit, which means interested parties can focus less on the Vols’ opponents and more on identifying the new shades of red displayed on Butch Jones’ face as his team fails to put distance between themselves and any/all of their remaining opponents before halftime.
  7. Florida Gators - Ain’t played nobody this week because they committed murder the week prior and were in timeout.
  8. Arkansas Razorbacks - After hearing so much about his penchant for starting seasons off slow and finishing them dominantly strong, it would appear that Bret Bielema has decided to do just the opposite this year.
  9. Kentucky Wildcats - The closer to basketball season we get, the better the Wildcats perform. There’s no way this is a coincidence.
  10. Vanderbilt Commodores - I’d like to say that the ‘Dores are improving, but I think the SEC East is just egregiously bad this year. Like, it’s been bad the past few seasons, but this could be the absolute pit. Bottom of the valley. Mariana Trench. It’s terrible.
  11. Georgia Bulldogs - This is one of the worst teams UGA has fielded in recent history, which means they’ll almost certainly beat Florida this weekend.
  12. Mississippi St. Bulldogs - You gave Kentucky a shot at a buzzer-beater, what did you expect?
  13. Missouri Tigers - Losing to a non-Power Five team at home on Homecoming is inexcusable; but if you want a silver-lining, take solace in the very real possibility that Middle Tennessee would finish third in the SEC East this season.
  14. South Carolina Gamecocks - I struggled with ranking the Gamecocks below Mizzou this week. It came down to this: Missouri lost to a team that’s actually pretty good, and South Carolina nearly lost to a team that hasn’t yet finished its fifth season in the FBS.