So that didn’t go great.
But we’re getting ahead of ourselves. Let’s back up.
A couple of weeks ago, we kicked off the Seventh Annual Rock M Nation #TremendousStubble Charity Drive, benefiting the MU Children’s Hospital. We made pledges to the hospital based on the performance of the Mizzou softball team in the Women’s College World Series. It was a time of great hope and joy and laughter and pomp and circumstance and memes.
And then, uh, the tournament started. And Mizzou quickly bowed out. It could’ve gone better.
Anyway: now that the Mizzou softball team’s run in the Women’s College World Series has come to an end, it’s time to make good on our pledges to the MU Children’s Hospital!
If you forgot what you pledged, head back to the original post and check it out. If you need to calculate some stuff, here are the box scores for Mizzou’s games in the WCWS:
(Like I said: it didn’t go great.)
In any case, total up what you owe, and then it’s time to donate.
HOW TO DONATE
Once again, the folks at MU Health have made it absurdly easy to donate. Here’s how.
STEP ONE: Click on this link. It’ll take you to a page that looks like this:
STEP TWO: See that box on the right that says “Gift Amount”? Put your total in there. If you want to be listed as a contributor, tick the “I would like to be listed as a contributor” box. If you’d like to make a silly comment (PLEASE KEEP IT CLEAN, YOU HEATHENS), do so in the “Comments” box. Then click “Add to Basket.”
STEP THREE: Enter your e-mail address on the next page, then click the comically oversized “GIVE NOW” button on the bottom right of the page.
STEP FOUR: The next page is literally a credit card form. You have navigated to this webzone, so you are clearly savvy enough to buy something online. It’s just like that. Fill out the credit card info and smash that “Pay With Credit Card” button at the bottom.
STEP FIVE: Psych! There is no step five! You’re done! You’ll even get a tax receipt and everything!
OK, so that’s how you do it. Now, let’s have two distinct conversations.
A WORD ON WELCHING
As I mentioned before: you’re clearly savvy enough to navigate to this webzone. As a result, you’re probably savvy enough to know that nobody is going to chase you down for your donation. This is the honor system. If you pledged something, and you decide not to follow through with your pledge, nobody’s going to stop you.
But this is money for sick kids. MONEY FOR SICK KIDS. If you’re the type of person that will promise money for sick kids and then not give that money to sick kids, quite frankly, I don’t want to be friends with you. Don’t follow me on Twitter.
So, welch if you want to. But just know that you’re a grade-A butthead* if you do.
* -pardon my language
A WORD ON OVER-DELIVERING
So, I’ve never had to write this part of this post, because it’s never been an issue. But I think it’s important.
Mizzou softball has been really good lately. Really good! Arguably the most consistently excellent program this side of the wrestling team.
This year kinda stunk. They didn’t play as well as they wanted in the regular season, and the Women’s College World Series was about as floppy as a flop can flop.
I’m not going to tell you what to do with your money. All I’ll say is that it would be super-rad if you would donate based on Mizzou’s usual performance as opposed to its most recent one. And then I would want to be friends with you, and you should follow me on Twitter.
There’s no hard-and-fast deadline — we’ll accept money whenever you can send it — but just for the sake of artificial urgency, let’s try to get as many donations in by the end of the week as possible.
If you’ve got questions, fire away in the comments.
Go Mizzou. Go sick kids. Go #TremendouStubble.