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Pete Don’t Fail Me Now: Previewing Wyoming, Trash Talk and Coozie Etiquette

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This week’s mailbag is delightfully all over the place.

UT Martin v Missouri Photo by Jamie Squire/Getty Images

No need for a long introduction. Let’s get right into this week’s questions.

Without factoring in the weather, I’d say Wyoming is most likely to stifle Missouri’s ground game. I know there were a lot of mitigating circumstances for why the rushing attack wasn’t great against UT-Martin (and 3.7 yards per carry against an FCS team is not great, Bob). But that’s probably the first area Wyoming would want to shut down, because Wyoming is going to have a better chance to force turnovers if Missouri has to throw the ball more.

THAT BEING SAID, with the weather possibly being ... poor ... I think stopping Missouri’s passing game is a little more likely for Wyoming.

Missouri SHOULD win this game comfortably, but Craig Bohl is a hell of a coach and factoring in the weather — well, this may be interesting.

Well, he’s still listed as a student in Missouri’s online directory. That’s not also a fool-proof way to get more information, but it’s usually a start.

Other than that, there’s no latest on him. No one has been privy to whatever personal issue is keeping him from the team at this point. So, no news, sorry to report.

I’ve actually put a lot of thought it into this. Some would say too much thought. No one would say not enough thought.

My final decision is the RKO.

I say this for a number of reasons.

  1. Element of surprise — The Goldberg Spear is a good choice, but you’ve got to build up and likely meet your attacker head on. With the RKO, you use your opponent’s momentum against them.
  2. Safety of the move — You’re using gravity, brother. Get your attacker right in that nook above your shoulder, and forcefully guide his face to the concrete below. Meanwhile, you get a cushioned landing on the meat of your backside.
  3. The Wow Factor — maybe this will debilitate your opponent physically, maybe it won’t. But what it will do is debilitate your opponent mentally and spiritually. There’s no coming back from getting RKO’d in a school yard fight. Time to transfer, my good man.

Easy answer is the ones on the depth chart. Those would be:

  • RB Tyler Badie
  • WR Jalen Knox, Kam Scott, Khmari Thompson, Dom Gicinto
  • LB Nick Bolton

However, based on Odom’s comments since the UT-Martin game, I could see Daniel Parker appearing in every game, as well as CB Jarvis Ware. Beyond those guys, though, I’d venture a guess that the rest redshirt, unless injuries start piling up.

Well it would depend on the type of cookie (hard, soft, cake-like) along with the filling. Also what type of pants are we talking here? You’re a mid-Missouri guy, so are we talking cargo shorts?

Wait...

Oh. Coozie.

In all seriousness, there’s a coozie etiquette. First off, you should always be prepared with a coozie when you’re going to be in a possible-drinking situation. The coozie should remain in your back left pocket — or opposite pocket from your wallet.

HOWEVER, be aware that if you’re using a coozie, it may get wet. In that case, I move it to the front pocket. Nothing worse than giving the impression of butt sweat.

Also, always use a neoprene coozie. Life is too short for fabric coozies and single-ply toilet paper.

Ask them what they’re expecting from kansas basketball this season.