BREAKING NEWS: KANSAS CHEATS, NCAA FINDS OUT

The NCAA is preparing to issue a notice of allegations that details multiple major violations in the Kansas men’s basketball program, The Star has learned.

The notice will come, sources told The Star, after a summer of speculation following a top NCAA official saying the organization would make findings against schools involved in a pay-for-play recruiting scheme investigated by the FBI.

When asked for comment, Dan Beckler, associate KU athletic director for public relations, told The Star that KU Athletics had not received any notification from the NCAA.

The news that college basketball teams cheated to get good recruits, specifically kansas, was shocking to the NCAA. Meanwhile, Mizzou fans:

The school to the west has been buying players since the days of Wilt Chamberlain... we been knew!

This however...

Former Adidas employee T.J. Gassnola testified in federal court last October that he made payments of $90,000 on behalf of Adidas to the mother of KU basketball player Billy Preston and $2,500 to the guardian of Silvio De Sousa. Gassnola also said he agreed to pay $20,000 to Fenny Falmagne, the guardian of De Sousa, to help Falmagne exit an agreement to send De Sousa to Maryland, an Under Armour school.

Gassnola testified that KU coach Bill Self was not aware of the payments.

Unaware. Mmmhmm. Sure.

Anyway, this post is here simply so we can laugh together.

UPDATE: Yahoo Reports Multiple Level 1 infractions and Lack of Institutional control!

Kansas has been charged with lack of institutional control, three Level I violations in men’s basketball and there is a head coach responsibility charge against coach Bill Self, according to multiple sources. There also are allegations against football, sources added, although those are Level II violations. The football allegations include charges of allowing an extra coach to work during practice under former head coach David Beaty.

The Level I violations are tied, in part, to the recruitments of Billy Preston and Silvio De Sousa. Court testimony and documents tied to the federal basketball corruption cases over the past two years included details of veteran adidas consultant T.J. Gassnola having “conspired to illicitly funnel approximately at least $90,000” to the mother of Preston. Gassnola also testified in court that he paid De Sousa’s guardian $2,500, although he denied arranging a $20,000 payment that had been discussed on wiretaps.

I’m just saying... NCAA, drag them.