First off, a big shout-out to Bill Connelly and the entire Rock M Nation crew!
Last week RMN turned this many: 10! [Zoulogy air horn] In honor of this momentous occasion, I ask the RMN community to blow out the candles and make a Missouri sports-themed wish.
For example, do you wish for a return to D-Line Zou? A Final Four appearance from both the men and women’s basketball teams? An appearance of Waltz at your birthday party? An appearance of Butch Jones at your birthday party?
As always, hit us up in the comments with what you think you know about the state of Missouri football, your predictions for the Georgia game, and your wish. Before I reveal my thoughts, let’s take a look back at a few WITIK’s from last week.
What I Thought I Knew Last Week
First, the lie from last week:
51.4% of you were correct! I would never take Butch over Barry. The Mayor, on the other hand…
Speaking of Kentucky football, I KNOW they failed to reach more than 27 points against Southern Miss, Eastern Kentucky, and Eastern Michigan this season. I THINK Missouri is in danger of surrendering 30-40 points to the Wildcats this coming weekend. And that makes me sad.
40 points on the dot. To Kentucky. In football. Though, some of the defense did impress; mainly Brandon Lee, Terez Hall and Terry “The Fifth Element” Beckner, Jr. It is nice to see multiple play-makers on D, says this blogger.
Predictions: Missouri will not give up a touchdown on the opening drive… Drew Lock will not have more interceptions than touchdowns… Missouri will not win 55-6… Kentucky will win 34-10
Nailed it. Nailed it. Nailed it. Kinda nailed it.
What I THINK I KNOW
- I THINK the team’s response and effort against Kentucky was a pleasant surprise. I KNOW they need to show more than one game of fight to prove critics wrong and more important, for a chance at another W this season. Yes, they will indeed need maximum effort against Idaho and UCONN… maybe not against Tennessee.
- I THINK this past Saturday was Mizzou’s best all-around performance of the season. I KNOW the offense appeared more confident, at least. Thanks, Emanuel Hall!
- I THINK that offense, however, was big-play reliant and not necessarily “good.” I KNOW Mizzou fans should Kirb Their Enthusiasm; don’t expect a similar offensive outburst against Kirby Smart’s defensive-minded Bulldogs.
- Also, I don’t THINK I KNOW who is at fault: Drew Lock not being in-sync with his receivers, OR his receivers running wrong routes? Do you know?
- I THINK linebackers should cover every slot receiver, always. #MakeFootballGreatAgain
- I THINK Tucker McCann is just fine. I KNOW Rock M Nation jinxed the long-snapper.
- I THINK I hate that damn pass to the wide receiver in flat the more and more I see it. In fact, I KNOW I hate it. I hate it I hate it I hate it!
- I KNOW Oklahoma lost to Iowa State! I THINK… hahaha.
- I KNOW Ish Witter had a great game Saturday. I THINK we should celebrate that terrific performance with some bad puns!
1) The Ishbone Formation
2) Give a team an Ish, feed them for a day. Teach a team to Ish, feed them for a lifetime.
3) Isher Sweets
4) Trending on Witter
5) The Make-a-Ish Foundation
6) Wittersweet Symphony
7) Wittering and… Wittering and…
8) Ish ‘n Chips
10) ISH-EC – Ish Just Means More
(Note: With any luck, Bill Connelly will soon be unveiling a new nerd stat: Pun Differential. It’s sure to change the way we look at, and critique sports puns. Though, I fear my pun diff is currently in the red at -10.)
- I THINK Stoops tried to give us the game at the end. I KNOW the officials were having none of that. Well, one official in particular.
Statement from the SEC on the second to last play of last night's Missouri – Kentucky game pic.twitter.com/kujHIkoAVc— Dave Matter (@Dave_Matter) October 8, 2017
- I KNOW these things can happen in 16 seconds:
2) Joey Chestnut can eat 2 hot dogs
3) Ronda Rousey can do this
4) achieve fame
5) Take more than one damn shot at the end zone…
ICYMI, the slowest slothfficial in the SEC: (per Ben DuBose)
- I THINK these things move faster than that ref:
1) Pamela Anderson running in slow-motion on the beach, stopping to twirl her hair, then resuming a leisurely, yet sultry jog
3) NCAA investigations
5) David Hasselhoff running in slow-motion on the beach, stopping for a bite of a burger and a swig of Smirnoff, then resuming a leisurely, yet drunken stagger
- I THINK that’s enough for today.
What do YOU think you know?
What I Hope to Learn from the Georgia Game
- I hope to find out Kirby Smart’s defense forgot to show up
- That Mizzou’s defensive play-makers I mentioned earlier, ya know, made plays
- When Sony Michel will finally graduate
- The truth...
What do YOU hope to learn?
- It won’t be pretty
- Mizzou will give up a touchdown on the opening drive
- Something good will happen on Mizzou special teams
- Something bad will happen on Mizzou special teams
- Cale Garrett will be called Cole more than once by the SEC announce crew
- I’ll attempt to get Cale Smoothie trending
- Tucker McCann won’t miss a FG or XP
- Terry Beckner will haunt Sony Michel’s dreams
- I’ll tweet out some benign Mizzou quip during the game only to receive a “sorry, I’m not watching Tigers football until they #FireOdom” response because that’s how this thing works, apparently
- Larry Rountree will lead the team in rushing because this game will be dumb
- Drew Lock will have 2 good quarters of football and 2 bad quarters of football
- Cale Smoothie will not trend
- I’ll give my dog, Cooper, dirty looks throughout the game
- Georgia will win 49-20
- In a stunning, tearful post-game press conference, self-proclaimed gladiator Eric Beisel will admit to never actually seeing the movie Gladiator
What are YOUR game predictions?
I’m on this week’s Zoulogy podcast!